Being Over 65.
It's May and a few days ago I officially became what used to be called an Old Aged Pensioner.
Now that I'm a Senior Citizen my body must have atrophied and my brain turn to mush because:-
- whereas I was getting weekly calls from head hunters about reasonably high powered jobs, I'm lucky if I get a tentative offer for a temporary job in a school as a handyman.
- I'm told we should downsize the house... because it's getting too much for me at my age.
I do not have arthritis, a dodgy heart, obesity, high cholesterol, dementia or high blood pressure. And "for my age" I'm remarkably fit... something that's said often with a look of disappointment on people's faces.
- Today alone I had 7 letters because of my age:
* One from the NHS offering me a free NHS healthcheck
* Two from life insurance companies sending me P60s and showing just how little they're actually paying me per month.
* Two from BT showing how much I owe them and telling me not to worry.... because they'll take all my money in a week's time!
* Pretty much the same letter from the Gas & Electricity companies, both of who are unilaterally putting up my monthly Direct Debit because they reckon I'm not paying enough at my age. Again.... I'm not to worry, because they'll do it anyway. Is it just coincidence they up the ante at the beginning of the Summer period when my usage will be at its lowest, but payments at their highest.
So what happened when I turned 65 that was good?
- I'm allowed to set up my model railway again. It's no longer playing with trains.
- I'm allowed to have my second childhood.
- I can talk to myself and have an intelligent conversation.
- Pregnant women give up their seats to me on the tube.
- I get a bus pass, which I've never applied for.
- I get a Senior Railway card... which I have to pay for!
- I get a company pension that's a smack in the face after working in the computer industry for 45 years and making millions for a number of companies... but every little bit helps!
- B&Q gives me 10% discount on Tuesdays.
- The hairdresser down the road gives me a 50% discount on Thursdays... presumably because there isn't that much hair to cut any more!
Please note.... I haven't mentioned the dreaded word RETIREMENT because I WANT to work. I have a brain and I'm lucky that now I write books I can at least do something I can't be criticised for wanting to do.
So buy my books at you local bookshop, or on Amazon at:
and let me fade away in some sort of style!
I shall continue to blog on, Dudes!