Tuesday 24 July 2012

What to post tonight?    Age! What else?


I hate being old, don't you?

But then how old is old? I'm 63 and can't believe it. If I get any older I'll be able to believe it even less!. All my memories and favourite times tell me I'm somewhere between 20 and 45, depending on the memory. Either way I was young! And still am.

I first knew I was getting on in age when a pregnant lady offered me her seat on an underground train...and I nearly took it! Good manners and obstinacy took the better of me and the fact that I was with my wife. Besides I've never been good at delivering babies on trains.

The cult of youth, much of which is down to politicians and marketing people realising the potential buying power of kids has badly backfired on the older generation. Every car these days seems to have a bass beat that sends ripples down the tarmac and has no regard for passersby or people who live in thearea. All the car's windows are wound down and the booming bass is at top volume. As there are traffic lights just down the road from my house and the cars stop occasionally I go to any trespassing car and ask the owner to turn the volume up a bit, or if he / she refuses I ask them to turn to Radio 4 because Desert Island Discs is on. I've often had some strange hand signals....and given some back.
In Asian countries the older you get the more revered you become. Grand parents are the top of the tree and no one would dream of popping them into an old folks home. It gets even better when you die of old age and become an honoured ancestor. I'm still at the suffered guest stage and intend to stay that way for many years to come.


In the UK there are advantages and probably pleasures to be had from being old. 
- Your memory is not expected to be good so forgetting something is fine...so long as it's not the wife's birthday, or an anniversary.
- I forget what the rest are but I'm sure there's loads.
    Oh yes.
- Doctors expect you to pop in for a chat, and not because there's anything wrong with you.
- You can hold people up on the pavement as you shuffle along, mumbling to yourself.
- Quiz programmes are required viewing so you can shout at the the TV to tell idiots how stupid they are for not knowing the 5th prime number in 10 seconds
- You can annoy people getting on a bus when you take out a little purse and count out 57p in one penny coins and then decide to give a £10 note after all.
- You can belch and fart after a meal and people expect it.
- Come on Oldies. Let's have some suggestions.


So, I'm old and I'm sure there was a point to this post, but for the life of me I can't think what it was. I'm sure you'll understand as I stutter to a grinding halt and go to bed. Snore!

Blog on, Dudes!

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